A Trip to Big Lots
Recently, I visited Big Lots, the shoddier, seedier cousin of the sadly departed K-Mart and elephant graveyard where discontinued merchandise goes to die. There I found freakish goods hailing from a variety of lands, and each revoltingly unappetizing in its own diverse fashion. Here's a sampling:
Oysters in Cottonseed Oil -- because nothing piques one's culinary delight quite like grayish fish flesh tinned in industrial lubricant.
Del Monte DILL -- Far too pale and estranged from their state of origin to serve such a function, at least these DILLS know the value of education and plan to attend jr. college.
Oysters in Cottonseed Oil -- because nothing piques one's culinary delight quite like grayish fish flesh tinned in industrial lubricant.
Lemon Extract -- With 20% Vaseline added to reduce viscosity
Del Monte DILL -- Far too pale and estranged from their state of origin to serve such a function, at least these DILLS know the value of education and plan to attend jr. college.
Nutrisystem Nourish -- Eat oxymoron dogs, on the cheap!
Maggi Delicias de Pollo -- Or as I affectionately call it, bagga chickin maggit stuff.
Jelly Mints -- Hated at Grandma's house since 1853.
Conclusion? Big Lots -- Repository of vomitously inedible foodstuffs.
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Violet: Yes, it is but one of many stores in town, but at least it's an adventure every time!