Forty Minutes to GF
Sometimes, I entertain random messaging on the interwebs. Sure, I know it's foolish but I sometimes do. I think it has something to do with ongoing research about what percentage of the human race has anything interesting to say. By current estimates, data approaches approximately 1.2%. And you, of course.
The other night I was bantering boringly with some random jackass. The conversation wasn't moving along very swimmingly at all. He kept quizzing me about general life info: what do I do, kids, family, hobbies, sorry your parents are dead, blah, blah, etc.
Then after about 40 drawn out moments, in which I was giving halfass answers and chatting with two other (interesting) people, reading Wikipedia or some such at the same time, he says, "So do you want to be my gf?"
Hmm. GF. Garden Funder? Grappling Fondue? Gargoyle Foot?
He also refused to send any pics at first, asking, "Is my appearance all that important to you?" and then when he did, it looked like he'd haphazardly clipped 3 different shots from the Abercrombie catalog.
I am now befuddled. Should I be this man's Gesso Furnace?
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There's always something to write about. If there's not then you need to live life more aggressively.
-- Min Kim, Better Blogging Brainstorming, SXSW 2006
The other night I was bantering boringly with some random jackass. The conversation wasn't moving along very swimmingly at all. He kept quizzing me about general life info: what do I do, kids, family, hobbies, sorry your parents are dead, blah, blah, etc.
Then after about 40 drawn out moments, in which I was giving halfass answers and chatting with two other (interesting) people, reading Wikipedia or some such at the same time, he says, "So do you want to be my gf?"
Hmm. GF. Garden Funder? Grappling Fondue? Gargoyle Foot?
He also refused to send any pics at first, asking, "Is my appearance all that important to you?" and then when he did, it looked like he'd haphazardly clipped 3 different shots from the Abercrombie catalog.
I am now befuddled. Should I be this man's Gesso Furnace?
---------------------------------
There's always something to write about. If there's not then you need to live life more aggressively.
-- Min Kim, Better Blogging Brainstorming, SXSW 2006
Comments
Grilled Fajita?
Great Friend?
Gooey froggy?
Gorilla face?
What a douche. He probably has other internet GFs so watch out!
What a wierd-o.
LTMC: Torrid in the sense of Goofy Facemaker.
ps. If the guy can't actually write out the word "girlfriend" he probably lacks the commitment to be your "BF" (and by BF I mean "Belching Frankenstein", of course).
Aza: I beware everyone, Aza, believe that.
Camplin: You made me go and look up "gadfly" -- 'tis a Good Fit for this situation.
Trevor: I'd have an easier time being someone's Guardian Force than being their girlfriend, I think.
Steph: Nah. This gadfly wasn't NEAR that interesting.