Thursday, September 11, 2008
Monday, September 08, 2008
And, more importantly, is she a dominatrix? What do y'all think?
Whenever I fail to revise or begin
The tang of her leather falls across my skin
Whenever I succumb to procrastination
She provides me with vexing inspiration
Repeated lessons in being humble
Smart yet again as I continue to bumble
Shuffling my way across this earth
She delights in the torture of excessive girth
As dogs eat dogs and barracudas shred
Creative thoughts flow through my head
To gain new power the antiquated hag
Shoves down my throat introversion’s gag
An abyss of deep feeling imprisons me
Chained among careless society
My heart’s lifeblood flowing down to the floor
She ties my feet in my mouth and slams the door
If of seeing the sun I begin to dream
She lassos round my self-esteem
She won’t permit a lick of pride
Preferring my tongue on her heeled boot’s stride
Though I might be gifted on one side of the score
There’s a downside that amuses that sadistic whore
‘Til the day I die, from the day I was born
Has dug nonconformity’s spiky thorns
For my own good, she will declare
Down through the ages’ dusty air
“Let infinite punishment on her rain!
Eternal beauty is born of pain.”
"My plug-in baby /crucifies my enemies / when I'm tired of giving."
-- Bellamy, Wolstenholme, Howard
Tuesday, September 02, 2008
SCENE: Standing in line at Walgreen's with a Take Five candy bar and a box of Garnier Nutrisse Hair Color, Macadamia #90, in my hands, behind a lady who had only a magazine.
PLAYERS: Cashier, The Lady In Front of Me, Me
(As the scene opens, Cashier rings up the magazine...)
CASHIER: Ok, one magazine (patronizingly)... Can I interest you in a Snickers bar today?
TLIFOM: Umm, well ok, I guess. I'm going to the hospital. (She takes 3 Snickers bars from the Cashier.)
CASHIER: Great, because when you're hungry, why wait?
ME: (stifled, unbelieving snickers) (not the candy bar, the giggles)
CASHIER: (eyes me with slightly slitted eyes, addresses TLIFOM) Thank you, come back.
CASHIER: (to me) Hi, how's it going? (rings up candy bar and hair color) Can I interest you in a Snickers bar today?
"We are now accepting callers for these beautiful pendant keychains."
-- J. McCrea, et. al.