Wednesday, November 02, 2005

The Number One Way to NOT Be Badass

Is to get this in response to your teeny-tiny-little-speck-of-hope-ass email:

"I found someone. I'm in a relationship now for about 3 months. It's going pretty well. What have you been up to?"

What's the moral of this sad, sad thing, kids?

Avoid hope like the plague.

Don't listen to Jesse Jackson.

Kill hope like it was a rat-sized fire ant that burned a flag on your front lawn on the Fourth of July.

5 comments:

Amandarama said...

Yes. What is this "hope" thing you speak of? It sounds dangerous...

Latigo Flint said...

Red:
"Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. It's got no use on the inside."

Lance Manion said...

"Kill hope like it was a rat-sized fire ant that burned a flag on your front lawn on the Fourth of July."

Sweet zombie Jesus, I think I just found a new personal philosophy!

Ari said...

I no longer want to speak its name, Amanda.

It's true, Latty. On the inside or on the out, wherever people are held prisoner by something, suffering a mite of it to live is birthing sleepless nights and madness.

That just makes me want to go on with similar hyperboles of how to stamp out and snuff out this dandelion weed of death.

I may turn to full on Buddhism just to rid myself of it.

Lance Manion said...

Please continue with the hyperbole! Because if you can't take delight in someone else's suffering, then where the hell else can you take it? You know?

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