Video killed the...

Yesterday I had to videotape myself for a school assignment.

Rather than the intended purpose of causing me to reflect upon my professional skills, it rather drove me into a blizzard of self-deprecation regarding my physical appearance, demeanor, and romantic prospects.


1) I exude no sex appeal whatever, in the absence of cantilevered* physical attributes.

2) I'm not that hot a dresser, most days.

3) I should really not push my hair behind my ears like that.

4) The thought, "Oh. Wow. Who would want to mate with that?"

So, legions of manhood who are neither elbowing nor jousting one another in a frenzied rush for my attentions, I forgive you.

Now I understand.

* - "cantilevered" used courtesy of Margaret Atwood, The Edible Woman


Julie said…
We are always hardest on ourselves.
I have to say that you must be full of shit.
that is stinkin thinkin and cut that shit out!
Ari said…
Aw, I was just kiddin, Jules. The real tragedy is that until I see myself in a photo, I think I'm pretty durn sexy. :)
Julie said…
you know when i saw that picture of you when you bleached your hair,, I really liked it.
If I was into women, I might even move to texas for you, lol! YOu really are very pretty.
Lance Manion said…
I still think you're beautiful, Ari. And it's not just the mimosas talking!
Ari said…
Hey, nothing like a little blistering self-hatred to bring in the compliments! Thanks y'all!!

Seriously though, this is just a moment in time. I have more of a problem with NOT realizing how much flab I have to lose. This only comes up whenever I shoot video, which is like... not a lot.
If you really want a measure of your attractiveness, post a video clip of yourself on the Internet.

Then tally the number of pervs who attempt to contact you.
Amandarama said…
I'm really at my best when my attributes are "cantilevered" as well.

Don't get down on yourself. Frankly, I don't think I could watch a video of myself teaching and not break my tv screen.
Rob Seifert said…
My bet is that you're far sexier than you think you are. Lord knows I'd better be more sexy than I think I am! Chuckle...


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