Monday, July 04, 2005

Seven Petty Wishes

Wait, not that Petty.

Forget that unattainable red herring, world peace, and that impossible mackerel, harmony amongst the peoples.

Gimme seven petty wishes instead.

1. That I'd never spill red salsa or spaghetti sauce on a white shirt again.

2. That I'd never break off the cork in the wine.

3. That I'd never see someone I either a) already know, or b) would like to get to know ;)
whilst dressed in a slobtastic fashion, i.e. during a "fertilizer 'n' Roundup run" to Home Depot in the middle of yardwork.

4. That I'd never have to go potty in the middle of a movie again.

5. That all my garments would be forever wrinkle-free, sans ironing.

6. That I'd never get home with a corn dog and no mustard in the frickin' bag.

7. That my lawn would stay magically hydrated, in accord with local rainfall, and in compliance with city water-saving ordinances.

What're y'all's petty wishes?

Tell 1, tell 7 or tell 70. I promise to read them all.

(Do you suppose Tom Petty could grant them? Richard Petty? I oughta write somepetty a letter and see.)


"You've got to bleed a little while you sing / Lest the words don't mean a thing." -- The Cult


defiant goddess said...

I just ditto your #3. I am good for walking out the house looking slobtastic.

Azathoth said...

1. that my Demon would think about me more than I think about her.

2. that I would find time to see the movies I want in theatres instead of finding on the shelf of the video store going "I wanted to see that!"

3. that sleep and I would become better friends.

4. that Stephen King wouldn't retire!

5. that I could find 2 socks that match, instead of the 30 differant ones I seem to have.

6. that that damn raise in the walkway would stop trying to trip me by crushing my pinkie toe!

7. and that I could remember one of the 35 chapsticks I have when I go out instead of having to buy a new one every time!

Ari said...

LOL Goddess. Sometimes I just can't be bothered to dress anew for a 10 minute trip.

Aza, if you don't mind waiting for movies, I recommend Netflix. OH how I love it.

For the socks, just buy all your socks the same. Then it doesn't matter.

Jessica said...

1. My relatives would stop fighting.
2. for my photographic memory back (I lost it somewere in grade two)
3. that all my work would be done (well) with the snap of my fingers.
4. that there will always be something good on TV, the radio, etc.
5. I could complete immunity to every infectious disease so that I could go anywhere (in the world) or do anything I want.
6. Eat yogurt and drink orange juice at the same time without vomitting.
7. Talking really fast without getting my tougne twisted or confused

Ari said...

I like the idea of a photographic memory, but only if it's selective... i.e. I would only photographically remember things I CHOSE to remember that way. :)

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