The Number One Way to NOT Be Badass

Is to get this in response to your teeny-tiny-little-speck-of-hope-ass email:

"I found someone. I'm in a relationship now for about 3 months. It's going pretty well. What have you been up to?"

What's the moral of this sad, sad thing, kids?

Avoid hope like the plague.

Don't listen to Jesse Jackson.

Kill hope like it was a rat-sized fire ant that burned a flag on your front lawn on the Fourth of July.

Comments

Amandarama said…
Yes. What is this "hope" thing you speak of? It sounds dangerous...
10:48 PM
Latigo Flint said…
Red:
"Let me tell you something my friend. Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane. It's got no use on the inside."
1:23 AM
Lance Manion said…
"Kill hope like it was a rat-sized fire ant that burned a flag on your front lawn on the Fourth of July."

Sweet zombie Jesus, I think I just found a new personal philosophy!
9:20 AM
V said…
I no longer want to speak its name, Amanda.

It's true, Latty. On the inside or on the out, wherever people are held prisoner by something, suffering a mite of it to live is birthing sleepless nights and madness.

That just makes me want to go on with similar hyperboles of how to stamp out and snuff out this dandelion weed of death.

I may turn to full on Buddhism just to rid myself of it.
10:52 AM
Lance Manion said…
Please continue with the hyperbole! Because if you can't take delight in someone else's suffering, then where the hell else can you take it? You know?
3:01 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Very Sad News

Hi everyone, Because friends share in good things and bad and this is important to me, I thought you all might like to know. My mom, who had been battling many health problems, especially during the past few years, passed away Friday night. She was not a perfect person, but her love for me was. I figure if you want to know more, you'll ask. But if I don't seem quite myself for awhile, that's why. Thanks.
Read more

Unintentionally Arty Photo

Image
While I was thinking about making a post about people who plaster their faces on billboards, I snapped this photo near downtown with my new camera phone. Though many might be pissed at the poor quality of the photo, it was taken at some distance, and I rather liked how it turned out. You can still make out the Big Brother-like face of the realTOR (yet another irritant -- those commercials touting realTORs) on the sign. He works them there M streets. He isn't all that attractive. So why plaster your face 25 feet high for all to recoil at? Is it gaining or losing you customers? I'd bet on the latter. There's another one of this guy, ESPN radio host Randy Galloway, a round the corner from my house. I get a shock every time I round the bend and see it. Geeg. It's got to be ego-driven. There's no other good reason. And if I can't paint my garage door magenta, why in blazes is this allowed?
Read more

Shredding, Slamming Fun

Image
Yeah, I'm closer to 40 than 14, but that doesn't mean I can't pretend to be in that band I always wanted to be in. And no, I can't play the guitar for real, but that doesn't mean I can't enjoy the tar out of this game. In fact, that's the whole POINT. The second version of this Playstation 2 diversion, called Guitar Hero as you can see here, just came out, but I'm too busy woodshedding on a borrowed version of the first one to care about that yet. At first, I sucked so thoroughly the game kicked me out of the song and the crowd booed. Yet now, I can successfully hit 80-96% of the notes on average of tunes ranging from Boston's "More Than A Feeling" to Audioslave's "Cochise." The cool thing is, songs you don't even like much and dismiss as crap, you get new respect for when you try to play them. You also learn how Nikki Sixx must have felt when his fingers and forearms ached from the amount of rockin' he was doing, but
Read more